


Shelter

by Adri_K



Category: Pillars of Eternity
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:40:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24523987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adri_K/pseuds/Adri_K
Summary: This is basically just a collection of prompt replies (to the same prompt even), centering around the theme of "comfort kisses", featuring my Watcher, Gaura. Some of the relationships featured here are romantic, others are not. Overall this is an exploration of different dynamics expressed through similar acts of intimacy.
Relationships: Aloth Corfiser & Female Watcher, Aloth Corfiser/The Watcher
Comments: 10
Kudos: 33





	1. Chapter 1

Gaura was half-asleep when she heard knocking on her cabin's door. She yawned as she sat up and tried to rub the drowsiness from her eyes. She noticed that she rubbed them to rythm of the sea shanties sung above by her crew. The realization made her smile. The Watcher quickly made her way to the door to let Aloth in - she could recognize his soft, considerate but still insistent knocking anywhere.

The wizard was only half-dressed: he only had his trousers and his sleeveless undershirt on. The Watcher noticed the marks of crumpled sheets on his skin as soon as she laid eyes on him. Aloth shot her a quick, tired smile but he couldn't hide the anguish in his eyes.

'I'm sorry, did I wake you up?' He asked.

'Only sort of,' Gaura stepped aside so he could come in. 'You know, this could be avoided, if you just moved your things in here.'

Aloth let out a nervous chuckle as he stepped past her. 'Forgive me for saying this, but your presence is... a little overwhelming. As of now, I mean.'

The Watcher's heart sank. 'Am I too much?' She asked as she closed the door behind the wizard and let out a sigh.

'No! No, that is... not what I meant,' Aloth reached for her hand gingerly, prompting her to turn towards him. 'It's just... when I'm by your side, I find it all the easier to let you occupy my every thought,' a blush spread on his face. 'I... often have to re-read the books I read in your presence,' he let out a short, awkward laugh.

Gaura softly chuckled at the admission and left a peck on his lips. 'So you're saying, I'm distracting you.'

'That might have been a better way to put it,' Aloth's blush took a deeper shade. The Watcher laughed again, her voice ringing louder and clearer, and she pulled him into her embrace.

'Relax. I'm the one who needs to apologize,' she said as she caressed the elf's hair. 'I did promise I wouldn't make demands of you, didn't I?' She pulled away slightly and ran her hands down Aloth's chest. She played with the hem of his shirt as she continued. 'I guess I get overwhelmed by my feelings for you too.'

Gaura glimpsed the wizard's lips curving up ever so slightly before he pressed them against hers. She kissed back, slowly, casually, lazily, hoping that Aloth could read the safety and warmth he filled her with from the movement of her tongue and taste of her mouth. She grasped his shirt and stepped back, pulling him along until her back hit the cabin door.

'You didn't come here to discuss semantics, I hope,' the Watcher whispered, her face not even an inch away from the elf's.

'Indeed,' Aloth sighed and pulled away. He gave her a pained and apologetic look. 'However I didn't come for the reasons you assume either,' he turned his gaze upwards to the ceiling, and the music coming from abovedeck. 'I know that singing is a sign of a happy crew, but...' he closed his eyes, his face was distorted by anguish for a moment before he looked at the Watcher again, 'it makes sleeping a particularly challenging ordeal.'

'You don't need to tell me about that,' Gaura replied as she made her way back to her bed. She sat down and patted a spot beside her. 'Tell me then: how would you like me to help?'

Aloth followed her to her bed, but instead of sitting down, he stood a step away, in front of the Watcher, and nervously wringed his fingers.'I just... I would like to listen to you instead of them.'

Gaura smiled at the request, even if she didn't quite understand Aloth's anxiety over it. She lied down, making sure that he had enough space to lie beside her. Aloth, however, leaned over her once he climbed on the bed.

'Would you mind?' He asked, his fingers brushing against Gaura's thigh gently. She gave him a nod and the two shuffled around until Aloth got to rest between her legs, and he could lay down his head on her chest, right above her heart.

Gaura smoothed down a flame that fluttered as her heart started racing. She sung the first tune that came to her mind, hoping that she could distract the wizard from her rapid heartbeat.

_'It's a fine three-master, thin like a bird...'_

Aloth sat up immediately and turned to her, frowning. The Watcher burst out laughing and sat up as well to leave a kiss on the scar above his brow. His expression softened at the touch of her lips and a moment later, he was laughing as well. Gaura gave him a kiss on the lips then, which was turned shallow by their smiles.

When they laid back down, Aloth moved a little higher - he rested his head on her collarbones this time, close enough for the Watcher to feel the scent of his hair.

'What do you want me to sing then?' She asked, tracing each long strand of his hair with a finger.

There was a pause. Gaura was almost convinced that Aloth fell asleep.

'I remember a melody I heard in Brighthollow,' he spoke quietly and cautiously as if his reminiscence was both an old story and heavy cofession weighing on his heart. 'During particularly sleepless nights, if I opened the window and listened intently, I could hear a song played on a violin.' He chuckled a little joylessly, somewhat overcome by nostalgia and seemingly unaware that the Watcher's hand stopped.

Distant memories surfaced in Gaura's mind. There were nights at Caed Nua, when the spirits where particularly restless, too restless for her ignore. On these nights she would pick up her violin and venture into the hedge maze behind Brighthollow. She would play. Just play. Each note left the strings at random, or so she thought. She didn't think anyone was listening. And she didn't think the mere mention of it would... That it would...

'I'm not even entirely certain I truly heard it. Maybe my exhaustion used to played tricks on me,' Aloth continued. 'But right now... That would be the song I'd like to hear most. Isn't that silly?'

Gaura blinked, trying to supress the prickling sensation in her eyes and pressed her lips on Aloth's hair. She took a moment to calm herself before she answered.

'Those were improvisations, Aloth. I never recorded them.'

Her reply prompted the wizard to push himself up and look at her. The Watcher shrugged and deep down she hoped, she could stand his gaze without bursting into tears.

'They're gone,' she said. 'Along with my violin and Brighthollow.'

Aloth nodded as he processed her words. Gaura could see her flames reflected in his eyes whole he watched her.

'I miss Caed Nua, too. Even with the ghosts and the monsters swarming up from the Endless Paths... It was a place that felt like home. Moreso than anywhere else I've ever been.'

The Watcher sighed. 'I suppose much of what made Caed Nua feel the way it did,' she cupped Aloth's face, 'is right here.'

The wizard blew a kiss on her palm and the warmth of his gesture spread all over the Watcher body in an instant.

'That truly means a lot,' he said before he leaned in for another kiss on her cheek. 'I'm certain Neketaka has a music shop somewhere, I'd be happy to help you find a new violin next time we go there.'

'And I'm certain I can think of a lullaby for you,' Gaura smiled at him. 

'If you feel inclined,' Aloth laid back down, 'but it's no longer necessary.'

The Watcher listened. She couldn't hear anything but the ocean beyond her window.

'Typical,' she muttered, making Aloth snicker quietly.

In a few minutes, they drifted off into a deep sleep, surrounded by no sounds other than those of the crashing waves and their own breathing.


	2. Chapter 2

Gaura lost all sense of time. In addition to being tired, she drained herself through tears. She couldn't tell how long it's been since the last one started running down her cheek, then turned into vapor only to be blown away by the ocean wind. She glimpsed the first rays of the sun hitting the waves before a familiar voice dragged the rest of her awareness back from the empty horizon.

'Been lookin' for you in your cabin,' Edér offered the Watcher a cup of murkbrew. She took it with an absent-minded smile. Her voice was raspy as she said her thanks. 'Everything alright? You're rarely up this early,' the farmer asked casually as he lit his pipe, but Gaura still noticed his tense grip on the flintstone.

'I didn't sleep much,' the Watcher took a sip of murkbrew, hoping its warmth would ease her into talking. Because she had a lot to tell her friend and even more to ask. 'The gods woke me up and then... I guess I just didn't feel like sleeping afterwards,' she shrugged.

'Must've been one Hel of a conversation if it riled you up this bad.'

'Who says I'm riled up?' Gaura laughed bitterly.

Edér leaned against the railing of the ship, with his back to the water. 'If it's about the Wheel, then I reckon they're worried. But what else is new?' The question sounded like a rhetorical one, but his eyes were fixed on the Watcher and they were full of questions.

She didn't reply at first. After a moment, Gaura couldn't even stand the veteran's gaze. Edér moved closer to her, when he saw her reluctance and placed a hand on her back. It felt like an incredible weight pushing her down.  
'I learned a thing or two about godlikes,' her fingers thrummed against her mug. 'The gods... It's a last resort but...' The Watcher took a deep breath, and tried to push down the emotions that have plaguing her for the better part of the night. 'The gods can empower themselves by absorbing the souls of their godlikes.'

Edér's hand fell from her back a few silent moments later.

'I... I haven't told the others yet,' Gaura continued, 'I was trying to think of a way to break the news, but... I came up here for fresh air and I... I got nothing,' she let out a rueful chuckle.

'Let me know when you tell 'em. I don't wanna be on the same boat as Pallegina when she hears about this,' Edér joked but the pity in his voice supressed anything remotely humorous.

'I'm more worried about Tekēhu. He'll be heartbroken.'

The veteran stayed quiet for a fleeting moment while he took a long draw from his pipe, but his question was hanging in the air, as surely as the smoke he exhaled. Just as he opened his mouth to talk, Gaura interrupted him.

'I'll be fine. I... I just need a nap,' she emptied her mug in a few gulps. 'Nothing changed, I guess. I'm just now aware that... my soul has always been a hostage, and it always will be,' she looked at Edér, whose face now reflected confusion along with concern. 'I didn't forget your promise, Edér.'

'Gaura?' His voice rang with a warning.

'You told me you would stay with me until I got my life back. But I won't get it back. I never had it in the first place-'

'I know what you're getting at, and it ain't happening,' he grumbled as he struck the bowl of his pipe with the base of his palm, emptying the ashen remains of whiteleaf into the ocean.

'Listen, you had no idea what you were getting into. I won't bind you to a futile cause. It's bad enough that the gods have me,' Gaura stepped closer to him, but averted her gaze to her empty mug as if there was something in it, that would take the edge off her words. 'I don't want to be another Woden to you, or another Elafa...I don't know if I can bear that. I can bear whatever the gods have to throw at me but... I don't think I could bear that.'

'You got funny priorities,' Edér reached for the Watcher's face and tilted it upwards. 'I don't regret that promise. Don't think there's anything out there that could make me. So don't let it gnaw at your conscience,' he leaned in and left a surprisingly soft kiss on Gaura's forehead. He moved his hands to her waist and pulled her in an embrace.

The Watcher couldn't tell if it was the comfort of the farmer's closeness or if it was her own exhaustion that took over her, but her eyes closed a moment later and her turmoil was replaced by the bittersweet duality of gratitude and defiance.


	3. Chapter 3

There was always some light coming from the temple of Gaun. It couldn't compete with the blazing brazier from Magran's open temple or the glow of luminous adra from the temple of Hylea, but there were always some candles lit and the lantern held by Gaun's statue always illuminated the damp and dark space.

Or at least it used to.

Even standing at the entrance, Gaura could tell that... things have changed. The candles were still burning but their light didn't hold the same kind of presence as they did before. They were now lit and re-lit by the Dawnstars. Eothas weren't around to keep them lit for them after all. And the lantern... The lantern was like an empty void now, drawing the Watcher's gaze byan absence instead of a glow.

She was not the only one unable to tear their eyes away from the darkened statue. A tall, lean figure stood by the candles, his armor reflecting their dim light. Gaura cautiously approached him but something about his stiff posture gave her pause.

'Adaryc?' She called out to him. 

Her fellow Watcher turned to her and for a moment, Gaura couldn't decide if she saw relief on his face or that fevered desperation she remembered from their first encounter. Adaryc rushed to her, but stopped suddenly, just a step away from her, as if he remembered they were in public. Instead he gave her a slight, but courteous bow.

'I'm glad to see you're alright,' he said, and though he was sincere, the Watcher could still hear sadness in his voice.

Gaura took the final step separating them and wrapped her arms around Adaryc. He hugged back hesitantly at first, then tighter and tighter, trying to ease the shaking in his hands by grasping her.

'I'm sorry about Eothas,' the Watcher said eventually.

Adaryc scoffed. 'I know you had no love for him, but... thank you all the same.'

Gaura sighed. He was right. She had no love for the Shining God. Or so she thought. But she couldn't bring herself to hate him either. The world he envisioned was beautiful, just as he said, and in some ways she felt some kind of kinship towards him. It may have been due to half of her soul being trapped in his body and to the pieces of that half eventually merging with him. It may have been due to the kindness Eothas has shown her - he certainly treated her better than Magran ever has. But at the same she couldn't overlook the crimes he committed against her and the world. His ends were a dream of freedom that the Watcher was meant to turn into reality. And she saw no justification for the means. It was easier to dismiss her feelings as righteous anger. And it was easier to pretend her losses began and ended with Caed Nua.

'That doesn't mean I don't understand your grief,' Gaura said eventually. 'You were so full of hope and devotion the last time we met. I... If you want to talk...'

'What would be the point?' Adaryc pulled away but kept a hand resting on her waist, as if she was his only means of steadying himself. 'I came here hoping, that Eothas would...' he stopped and for a moment, Gaura thought he was trying to read her soul. But then he continued, quieter. 'Even if he marked me merely as a messenger, if I could find out what he intended for Readceras, and he allowed me to bring his word back home… I thought...' He shook his head and turned his gaze to the floor. 'I thought I would be redeemed,' he admitted.

'You still think being a Watcher is a sin,' Gaura sighed. 'Adaryc...'

'I meant no offense,' the commander interrupted her, 'I certainly don't see you as anything less than the hero you are. To me and to the world.'

'I'm just sorry I couldn't inspire you to feel better about yourself,' she took his face into her hands and forced him to look her in the eye. 'You are a good man, Adaryc. Scratch that, you are great. You wouldn't have become a Watcher if you didn't have a great soul. If you weren't the beacon of hope you are striving to be.'

A blush spread on Adaryc's cheeks. It may have been just a flicker of candlelight, but for a fleeting moment he looked as if he was smiling. And yet, as he opened his mouth to speak, every fiber in the Watcher's being told her, he was about to disagree with her. So she made sure she was a step ahead of him.

'And Eothas did have a mission for you.'

Adaryc blinked at the Watcher, stunned. He slowly closed his mouth as he processed her words but his eyes still reflected disbelief.

'Eothas wanted a world where gods and kith could be on more equal footing. He wanted us to form a new covenant,' Gaura explained. 'He broke the Wheel because he believed that rebuilding it, side by side with the gods, would create a society free from the corruption and ignorance that gods have infected us with. _That's_ his plan for Readceras.'

The commander didn't answer at first. After a while he reached for the hand on his face, lightly squeezing it as he pried it off.

'I suppose, in the meantime, the souls who will be trapped in the In-Between will need our help,' he said. His voice rang hollow of any sort of enthusiasm.

'Not just them. The living too. Animancers, who will need our senses if they want to rebuild the Wheel.'

'And I know many men of the faith who will turn to us for guidance,' he added.

Gaura smiled at him, then stood on her tiptoes to leave a kiss on his cheek. 'See? Readceras needs your determination.'

Adaryc chuckled ruefully as response. He spent a few moments examining the Watcher's features, his eyes gleaming with wonder.

'Once again you find me at a moment when my resolve falters. And once again... you become my inspiration.' 

Gaura laughed a little uncomfortably. 'I just reminded you of the things you've already got.'

'You're making me think I received a sacred charge the day I became a Watcher. That's not a thought I had before,' the commander said, his lips curving to a challenging smirk. 'I'm not sure I believe you, but I'm grateful I survived that day, and that I survived long enough to meet you.' He gave her his usual bow, once more, this time with his usual smile as well. 'I'm honored to shoulder this burden with you.'

'So am I,' the Watcher simply replied before she said her farewells, satisfied and content, knowing that Adaryc will be alright. That she will be alright. She was grateful that she got to hear herself, and believe every word she said. They both got to leave with a little more brightness. She will have to thank him for that the next time they meet.


	4. Chapter 4

Gaura groaned as she descended the stairs to the Assembly of Echoes. Minutes before, she woke up to her companions sleeping soundly but the archmage Llengrath was gone. It didn't take her long to guess where she went, especially with the imps and Tayn being as talkative as ever. But that still didn't make her feel any less frustrated with her.

She found the archmage standing by the remains of the Memory Hoarder but her gaze was fixed on the instrument behind it. The organ that was designed to steal memories now redistributed them - an outcome that went against Llengrath's wishes. 

Gaura sighed and rolled her eyes at no one in particular. She wasn't looking forward to the conversation she was about to have, but deep down a part of her just... wanted to have it. A small fragment within her soul reminded her of their alliance and it yearned for reconciliation, even if the Watcher wasn't entirely sure if that possible.

'You know, if you can't sleep, there are better ways to pass the time than this,' Gaura said as she approached the archmage. She grimaced at the disgusting mixture of different liquids - bodily and otherwise - splashing against her calves.

'I'm not in the position to afford wasting time on leisure,' Llengrath turned to her nonchalantly. 'Not with Maura still on the loose.'

'You should've checked the archives then, I doubt she has ever been down here.'

'I didn't want to obscure your investigations there. Besides you don't know Maura, there might have been hints here that you missed.'

'And yet, you don't look like you've found anything,' Gaura tilted her head questioningly. 'And you didn't look Hel-bent on looking for clues. So what's this really about?'

Llengrath looked away for a moment. The Watcher could almost hear a quiet, rueful chuckle but she couldn't tell for certain.

'I appreciate your... interest in the inner workings of my mind, but you don't need to do this. It doesn't take an archmage's wisdom to see that you're still angry with me,' for a moment the Watcher glimpsed something akin to guilt in her eyes, but that moment quickly passed, leaving the Watcher wondering if she imagined what she saw. 'And to understand why you feel the way you do.'

Gaura took a step closer to Llengrath. 'And it doesn't take a Watcher's insight to understand why you made your... suggestion.'

The archmage did not answer, just raised an eyebrow ever so slightly, showing the faintest interest in what the Watcher was going to say next.

'You're scared.'

Llengrath blinked at her incredulously, then let out a bitter scoff. 'Don't be ridiculous. I may be repulsed, but this place and this dead... abomination is hardly enough to scare me.' She looked back at the corpse of the Memory Hoarder, and her eyes immediately met one of the many pairs that somehow still looked full of anguish, even in their lifeless state.

The Watcher reached for her pack as she made her way to Llengrath's side. She found the thick tome among her many supplies, and let out a relieved sigh when she saw it both undamaged and unstained.

'Are you sure? Because to me, this "dead abomination" seems like a perversion of something I read about in this,' she said as she offered the annals of her predecessor to Llengrath.

The archmage's expression softened slightly at the sight of the tome. A slight smirk appeared on her face as she turned her attention back to Gaura. She held her gaze as she took the book from the Watcher.

'I suppose, I shouldn't be surprised by your curiosity. It was what brought us together in the first place, after all.'

'And if I haven't indulged your curiosity, our friendship would have ended before it began.'

'Friendship?' Llengrath's voice rang with doubt. 'If our work has proven anything, it is that we can barely work together as allies.'

'That's hardly my fault,' Gaura crossed her arms challengingly. 'You know damned well who I am and what I'm about. You know right from wrong. And yet you still asked me to murder masses of innocents.'

'It would have been a mercy. Now they have to suffer living with a consciousness that is not their own,' the archmage shook her head slowly. A flash of pity and regret gleamed in her eyes for a fleeting moment.

'Not if we take accountability for our decisions here. If I were you, I'd stop wishing those people were dead and start making plans how to help them.'

'This, however, was your decision,' Llengrath sighed. 'One, that I can't condemn even if it was mired with sentimentality.' She said as she opened the tome at a seemingly arbitrary page and ran her fingers along the text. Gaura couldn't help but feel that this was merely an excuse for her to avoid the Watcher's gaze. 'I only wish our approaches to morality and empathy were better aligned.'

'Yeah... So do I,' Gaura let her arms drop. 'But it's pretty hard to take your approach. You're pretty unique, after all,' she examined Llengrath's face but her composure was as cool as ever. She was almost convinced she didn't hear her, but that didn't stop her from continuing. 'You were passed down the souls of your predecessors. And one day you will pass down yours as well. It must've been hard to face what might happen if you weren't killed outright by the process.'

The archmage looked up at that. Her face showed no emotion but there was something in the way she closed the Annals of Llengrath and pressed it to her chest that made her look strangely vulnerable.

'Your line of logic is preposterous,' she replied. 'I will remember not to underestimate your imagination in the future.'

'It's a given in my line of work,' Gaura shrugged with a mirthless chuckle.

Llengrath's lips curled up slightly for a fraction of a moment, before her gaze drifted off to the empty air between her and the Watcher. She was lost in thought for several seconds, each seeming to stretch infinitely.

'However, if I were to follow this line of logic,' she spoke eventually, 'the idea of denying these people the same second chance at life that you were granted... it must have felt like an especially unfair and cruel request.'

Gaura briefly pondered the notion. 'No,' she waved off the idea with a scoff, 'we're smarter than this. We act on principles. Like "mass murder is plan Z".'

'We are indeed,' the archmage seemed to have relaxed a bit. And yet, an oppressive silence started growing between the two of them. Llengrath gave the Memory Hoarder one last, brief look, her eyes now openly showing discomfort, then turned to leave.

'Llen,' Gaura's voice had her stop in her tracks. 'I... It will take me some time to properly forgive you. Maybe a lot of time. But I really thought we could be friends.' The Watcher reached for Llengrath's hand clutching her tome but she decided against taking it when she saw her grip tighten on the book.

'I know it's small comfort, but I was hoping for that too,' Llengrath answered. Her gaze followed the hand that reached for her just a moment ago, and to Gaura's surprise, she hesitantly reached back for it. She held her hand awkwardly for a while, her face showing nothing but a thoughtful frown. 'Consider this as a gesture of good will and... consolation,' the archmage raised the Watcher's hand to her lips. The unexpected contact sent a small flutter down her blazing hair. Then just as suddenly, Llengrath let her go. She gave her a courteous nod then set out to the Temple of Revelation.

Gaura shook her head and pinched the bridge of her nose. 'Archmages,' she grumbled exasperatedly before she went after her


End file.
